Oregon Brewers Festival: Liver…unprepared…

Salud! I have finally recovered from that drunken field of revelry called the Oregon Brewers Festival enough to be able to post a review of the experience. First and foremost, I will say that if you are a lover of beer, then there is no excuse for you not going to this. Talk about big, like holey moley big. There were so many beers, there is no way you could do them all in one day. Well, maybe Downtown Brown could, but not a normal person. SwillJockey and got there when the taps opened, and some 13 beers later, we were joined by what looked like thousands of our closest friends, and a wicked bad stomach ache.

Although we tasted many, many beers, neither SJ nor I were able to find that “wow” beer. There were several that were good, or would qualify for “Easy Drinkin’”. There were far more that were straight nasty. But the main issue I had, was the sheer number of IPA’s. It had to have been like 50% IPA beers. And I hate IPA’s. There was only one stout out of the whole field of like 100 beers and it tasted like burnt wood. Someone with a taste for spoiled hoppy beer will have to come along with us next year to give a more objective review ;)

Now on to the beers! Since we tasted so many (thank goodness for the voice recorder), and liked so few, rather than do a review of each beer, I thought instead I would highlight the top two and bottom two of my drinking list. Lots of Beer + me = Bad!SJ will do a separate listing of his, since while I was wallowing in a rather misguided lunch of chicken bratwurst and sweet potato fries, he was off trying other varieties. Although not specifically highlighted here, I would like to give kudos to the Trumer Brauerei Pils for being light enough to keep me from vomiting at the end of the day.

The Keepers:

  • Terminal Gravity – TG Triple.
    This stuff was light and yummy. It had that light fruity flavor that I dig in Triples, and went down smooth. It also helped clear out the flavor of a particularly nasty porter I’d had a few minutes prior. The best of the fest for me – 4/6

  • Brewery Ommegang – Hennepin Farmhouse Saison.
    I’m not sure what a “saison” is supposed to taste like, but I liked this one. This was the first of the beers I actually “liked”. It had a flavor I can’t put my finger on. Orange maybe? It had virtually no aftertaste which was good. It was good enough to have one or two, but was a bit too flavorful for getting drunk on. – 4/6

Sink Food:

  • Bison Brewing – Organic Chocolate Stout
    I sincerely hope that this isn’t what organic chocolate tastes like. I was really hoping this would be good since it was the only stout at the fest, but instead my taste buds were greeted with the unmistakable flavor of burnt wood. I have to hope that maybe the keg went bad, because it was the worst stout I’ve ever had. Poured it out, and even the drain wouldn’t drink it down right away. – 1/6

  • Flying Fish Brewing Co – Bourbon Barrel Abbey Dubbel
    It is difficult to describe how bad this was. But I will do so by describing the attack on the senses I had when it was first poured. Immediately after pouring, I looked at SJ and asked, “is that smell the beer or the ground”? His sad reply, “its the beer”. It was a mixture of grandpa’s 2 dollar Big Lots bourbon and dirt. It needs its own public service announcement. “GI Joe says: Bourbon barrels and beer brewing don’t mix”. So terrible. – 0/6

HUGE crowds!Well there you have my abbreviated review of an otherwise unique beer experience. Despite our lack of wow, SJ and I resolved to come back next year and give it a go again, since the opportunity to taste so many beers for so little a price can’t be passed up. And next year…we eat before we get there.