Maharaja Pilsner — the king of subcontinental beers
Maharaja’s Premium Indian Pilsner is a pretty straightforward and tasty imported brew with a somewhat-uncomfortably on-the-nose-stereotype picture of 19th-century Indian royalty on the front. I’d place it in the realm of Beers That Are Really Ethnic Stereotype Jokes From The Simpsons (or, BTARESJFTS’s), almost as though the creators were 1950’s ad men trying to paint their product’s marketing image in very broad strokes for the rubes in Ohio who couldn’t identify India on a map. Also included in this category is Skullsplitter (with the prototype viking on the front), Moretti’s (with the middle-aged handlebar-mustachioed Italian man recursively drinking Moretti’s) and Punchy McCatholic’s (the Irish beer that I just made up, because I can make fun of my own ethnicity, right?).
Naturally, I had to pick up a bottle — just weird enough for me to drink. After popping off the cap, a dense wad of beer foam oozed up to say hello, at roughly the pace and shape of one of those black snake firecrackers that never fail to disappoint on the 4th of July. “That’s odd”, I thought, making a mental note not to make a “happy to see me?” joke about it in my beer review, since that would be unoriginal and lame. Nearly as unoriginal and lame as naming an Indian beer “maharaja”…
At first, it seemed strikingly sour, but it turned out this was because I had just consumed the World’s Sweetest Drink In The World (in case you’re interested, the “creamsicle”: amaretto, triple sec, OJ, sour mix, tonic, and some dental fillings, because you’re going to need them), without adequately rebooting my palate. After a sip or two, it turned out to be surprisingly good. I was almost shocked — I saw a beer imported from India, picked it up expecting (even looking forward to) some serious skunkiness, but it tasted as fresh as an MGD. Compared to some of the skunky disappointments I’ve gotten from other parts of the world (like half the stuff from Ireland), this was a definite pleasant surprise. I guess there must be a lot more demand for Indian beers than Irish beers in my neighborhood. Which I can live with. Because this Irish dude is multiculturally sensitive, hyper-aware of the un-PC leanings of beer labels, but most importantly, much happier to live in a neighborhood with Indian food (“mmm, buttery garlic nan”) than Irish food (“huh — did they have to boil everything, even the check?”).
Swill Jockey, and 
Frosty 5:17 pm on January 24, 2009 Permalink
3? 3????
Wow Walt, those Malt Liquors have done a number on you. If I see a positive review of Keystone or Natural Light any time soon, we are going to have a serious conversation. Go have some stout and purge your system.
Swill Jockey 12:53 pm on January 25, 2009 Permalink
Drinking stout will purge your system, but not in a good way.